THE WAY WE WERE

Sometimes a romantic love-story movie can stir up all kinds of thoughts and memories that have nothing to do with the film. This happens to me quite frequently as the decades speed by. This occurred again the other day when I was chatting with an old friend and colleague. We have known each other since we both started teaching back in the early ’70s. We were reminiscing about all our teacher teammates. Our principal and boss at that time wanted every teacher to work together with four or five other teachers as a team. In those early days, I had to teach a few English classes until my theatre department expanded. It took two years, and then I was full-time theatre arts forever, but during those beginning years, I was fortunate to be taken under the wing of several more experienced teachers. Oh, I learned so much. My friend on the phone echoed those same thoughts.

At first, we all rebelled against being forced to work within these guidelines and boundaries of a team mentality. We soon realized we had no choice, and we came to believe how smart our boss really was, even though none of us would admit it to his face. We were a cocky bunch. In time, I learned how to plan, research, and create excellent, relevant lesson plans. We discovered new teaching styles and how or when to fully implement them. We nurtured friendships that survived fifty years. We grew more confident and practiced every day to always be ourselves when facing a classroom of thirty-plus students. We had each other’s backs whenever anyone had a difficult day. We demonstrated to our students the strength of a united front, and encouraged students to see us as human beings just doing the best we could at any given moment. We laughed and cried together, and our hugs were available when needed. And if that wasn’t enough, my teammates would socialize together on the weekends. Two of them even became my bridesmaids for my first marriage. In so many ways, I was sad to go it alone when I had too many sections of theatre and I would have to move on. During those glorious moments, I don’t think any of us knew how good we had it. We were too young and invincible. Today, five of the original ten have died. My over-emotional and sensitive heart often turns to mush when I remember the poignant lyrics…”Memories light the corners of my mind…”

Songs often trigger a person. Sometimes it nails exactly what the composer intended or it can lead the heart in a totally other direction. I know what the song THE WAY WE WERE wants listeners to think about, but I just can’t. My memory box is too filled with not only old love affairs, but also friendships left behind, and the people who no longer walk this earth. The song puts life and human relationships into perfect perspective. I think about men I have loved, but couldn’t work it out because of overwhelming differences and expectations. I remember the losses of people I loved fiercely…my daughter, my parents, friends, and beloved students. I am lost in all the moments, thinking about THE WAY WE WERE, and didn’t or wouldn’t allow myself the grace to acknowledge that nothing can last forever. This is the beauty and power of 1973’s magical tale of two people who are lucky to be a part of each other’s life, if only for a little while.

THE WAY WE WERE was nominated for six Oscars and won two golden statues for Best Original Song and Musical Score. Barbra Streisand (FUNNY GIRL), who was nominated for Best Actress and portrayed Katie, did not want to sing the title song. She wanted to only act and be known just for that specific talent throughout this movie, but no one was listening to her arguments, and that’s a good thing. She took a while to convince, but thankfully, her fans would hear her strong, sultry, recognizable voice guiding TWWW to soaring heights filled with empathy for the mismatched couple. Hubbell, played by Robert Redford (THE STING), was the male other half. The two of them together created a fiery combo. They sizzled with every explosive, sexy, and endearing connection. It was movie history. In the end, TWWW was very profitable, grossing $50 million.

Streisand and Redford worked from two different perspectives. Streisand loved to rehearse each scene until each nuance was explored and placed. Redford hated rehearsing. He loved spontaneity. The two often clashed. It was hard to find that balance of when to stop so that the moment would not be lost. This was the dilemma for director Sydney Pollack (TOOTSIE, THE FIRM). He has been quoted in several interviews saying that the process was exhausting, yet he never doubted his casting choices. Pollack said he would walk that fine line between his leading stars anytime again. Pollack knew first and foremost THE WAY WE WERE was a love story, and he was an expert in creating this theme on celluloid. He instinctively knew how to build the necessary emotional arcs to explode on screen with incredible timing. It is a form of art, and Pollack is spectacular at his craft.

Streisand and Redford were mesmerizing on screen. They portrayed two opposites that could never see eye to eye. Their characters were passionate about different things, and no matter how hard they tried and failed, Hubbell and Katie had our attention. Oh, their hot and sometimes glares at each other were larger-than-life and made audiences’ hearts pitter-patter. The venture ensemble surrounding them throughout the passage of decades was brilliant as well. Kudos to Bradford Dillman and Lois Chiles who shared the spotlight and gave depth to the multiple layers of story content.

THE WAY WE WERE was written mainly by Arthur Laurents (ROPE, WEST SIDE STORY), who was inspired by his own love story with Farley Granger. The two were opposite men in every way, yet they were a couple during a time when it was difficult to be in a public, homosexual relationship. Laurents wanted the film to retain more of its political upheavals during the ’30s, ’40s, ’50s, and ’60s. It has been said that there were several blow-up arguments between him and Pollack about what stayed or was cut, but we all know the director has the last word. It could have been a totally different movie if that wasn’t the case.

One of my favorite bits in THE WAY WE WERE was when Redford and Dillman’s characters would challenge each other to declare “the best” moments in their lives. It always intrigued me as to their choices. It was all silly banter created to forget the pain or discomfort of any given moment. It was a game that served no purpose except to shield them from feeling anything authentic. Many of us do this every day in our life. This has stuck with me over the years, and that is why I’ll choose walking through whatever I am supposed to feel every second. Covering and compartmentalizing never works for long. It will usually be exposed in the end. Katie and Hubbell came to that conclusion too. It was a sad, necessary realization that anchored this film finally in honesty. This shattered, but beautiful love story will forever be remembered as a dramatic romance classic. The vision of Katie gently pushing Hubbell’s blond locks across his forehead is etched deep within our memories. A simple touch that paints a visual picture forever. Most of us freeze time similarly. If only we could recognize these profound moments the second they happen. Ahh, now that would be something and then we would be able to clearly see our authentic selves THE WAY WE WERE.

THE WAY WE WERE is available on Prime Video.