Why the hell did I subject myself to watching this heaping pile of trash in the theatre? I needed an escape and couldn’t see IN THE HEIGHTS since I have to wait to see it with my wife next week, and this was the only movie playing.

This unwanted sequel to THE HITMAN’S BODYGUARD hits all the wrong action notes. We get an annoying couple dynamic between Samuel L. Jackson and Salma Hayek and quick one-liners that mostly fall flat from funny leading-man Ryan Reynolds. After 30-minutes into this misguided sequel, the film was still introducing a cast of characters while globetrotting from one location to the next, including Capri (not the pants), Italy.

The only redeeming part are a couple of well-timed exchanges with Ryan Reynolds and Morgan Freeman. Outside of that, this movie should be pushed “Overboard” from a boat before it docks.

The theatres may be open again, but there are better experiences out there that create a “Triple AAA” day than this awful movie. I kept checking my watch, wondering if I could hire a hitman to save the cast from the embarrassment that is THE HITMAN’S BODYGUARD’S WIFE.

It will open to empty theatres on 18-June, where it should promptly be skipped.

Aaron "Dobler" Goldstein

Aaron Goldstein is a Product Manager by day, ludicrous speed content consumer by night. He’s a LA Film School Alumni and TV Academy / Producers Guild of America member. Aaron is a proud parent and dad joke enthusiast.

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