PREMISE
A reclusive author who writes espionage novels about a secret agent and a global spy syndicate realizes the plot of the new book she’s writing starts to mirror real-world events, in real-time.
THE GOOD STUFF
THE 2ND ACT- I’m going to give credit where credit is due. The second act of this film is masterfully done. The first act seems so disjointed and random, that is hard to feel strongly in either direction on whether this is a well-told story or not. But the second act of this movie starts hitting you with twists that are hard left turns that you come to realize are expertly set up by the random sequence of events that you saw in the first act.
There are at least two moments in the second act of this film where the audience I saw this with collectively and audibly gasped at a twist that was being presented. This was a fun theater-going experience… At least for that moment in time anyway.
SAM ROCKWELL- There is a reason why cinephiles the world over tend to really admire Sam Rockwell and that’s because he truly is a jack of all trades. We’ve seen him do everything exceptionally well…Â except action-star things. And here he really does convey an action star even with the dad bod and the more salt-than-pepper struggle beard. This is the action kind of role that you’ve always kind of wondered if he can do. He does it and does it with aplomb.
BRYCE DALLAS HOWARD- I was one of the very few who thought of Howard’s character in the Jurassic world movies to be likable, and worth rooting for. She’s always had an effortless likeability in my humble opinion. For the first two acts of this movie that’s exactly what she is while being the voice of the audience, and responding to all the wild things that go on up until the third act.
Howard does all of the heavy lifting in the best parts of this movie. That does need to be pointed out and emphasized.
THE BAD STUFF
THESE MUSIC CHOICES- I don’t know why this happened, but whenever a serious hand-to-hand fight or shoot-out occurs in this movie, there is a sudden blast of disco music of all things. I guess it’s meant to fit the style of the movie but in my opinion doesn’t even do that. It’s pretty jarring honestly, and it’s so obnoxiously loud. (At least in the IMAX theater that I saw it in) the music that plays in these action sequences is much louder than the action that’s actually happening on screen 100% of the time.
LACK OF BLOOD- This should be a rated R movie. This is a much better movie simply by adding language and blood, and given that this is the director of the first two kingsman films, and the 1st kick-ass film it is bewildering that this is not rated R. There’s so much direct violence involving weapons that have bloodless results that it was hard for some of the on-screen violence to not shatter my suspension of disbelief whenever it happened to come up on screen.
THE WASTED TALENT- One thing that pops out at you at the end of that trailer for this movie is the collection of names that are involved with this film. I believe more than anything else that the cast is the selling point of the movie itself, and if I’m going to be honest with you…. Well, you’re kinda being sold wolf tickets when it comes to that. That’s all I’ll say about that.
THE UGLY STUFF
CGI- This movie cost 200 million. I truly believe this film cost that much money because of two things: the number of exotic locations that the phone does take place in, and the heavy reliance on computer-generated imagery. It is all the more flabbergasting to consider that when you actually see how absolutely terrible the CGI looks, and how it actually gets worse as the film goes on. And hey, you can tell me that this is the style of this particular film and all to try and excuse what’s going on, but f*** that s***.
Quite literally all of the action scenes in the third act damn near look like cutscenes from a video game in the most negative way possible. People doing physical activity look rubbery as they move around, and there’s a shootout in a smoke-filled room in the third act that flat-out looks animated in parts. And I know that’s not done on purpose.
THE GARBAGE 3RD ACT- To even kind of get into the specificities of the plot that are problematic in the final act of the film is impossible to do. Why? Well because this movie dedicates itself to fooling the audience more than it does to tell a story that’s coherent. There are soooooo mini double crosses and backstabbings in a 30-minute span that at some point the brain just gets tired and the eyes start rolling.
Not only that, the dialog becomes so on the nose in a Scooby-Doo type “I would have gotten away with it if it wasn’t for you darn kids!” way that it’s cringe-inducing.
Not only that there’s a mid-credit scene that blatantly feels like a reach to try and get this made into a franchise!
**************
Sometimes you can have a movie that is real good for the vast majority of the running time only to have it completely get obliterated over the last 30 to 45 minutes. Examples include The Village, Knowing, Lucy, Downsizing, The World’s end, etc, etc, etc. ARGYLLE is of that ilk, and it’s really a shame too, because this was setting up something really creative and interesting. A damn shame this was.
ARGYLLE is in theaters now
