THERE ARE NO WORDS is playing at SBIFF (Santa Barbara International Film Festival), and I had the opportunity to see an early look. Here’s my spoiler-free take:
As a critic, it’s rare for a film to be so authentically raw that it leaves me at a loss for words. Yet, here I sit after watching THERE ARE NO WORDS, trying to find the words to describe this devastating exploration of family trauma. The plot involves the documentary filmmaker, Min Sook Lee, as the subject while she searches for answers with her father about her mother, Song Ji Lee’s suicide. Lee was only 12 years old when it happened, so all she has to draw from are her “emotional memories.”
For lack of a more elegant way to put it, that’s some heavy sh*t. And that heaviness is portrayed as Min Sook discovers the narcissistic traits of her father, while also finding out more about how the war affected her family. The documentary includes themes of emotional abuse, suicide, and family trauma, which may be triggering for some viewers. It’s brutal to watch, and the fact that Min Sook was brave enough to put all of this on camera is a testament to her courage.
There’s one line that stuck with me the most, which is, “There must be a lot of people who are stuck having to care for parents who are emotionally abusive or violent.” In my life, I’m currently struggling with how much time to help care for my father, who needs help, yet is almost impossible to take care of. Clarification, he’s not emotionally abusive or violent. However, even the toll of caring for a complex patient is emotionally and physically draining. I cannot even fathom how Min Sook was able to persevere through it all.
Beyond my reflections, audiences can find a sense of solidarity in shared struggles, as Min Sook’s journey reflects on personal hardship and offers a universal narrative of overcoming familial pain. This makes the documentary a powerful commentary on the challenges many face in maintaining their family relationships.
Final Thought: ‘There are no words’ for how a child could process the pain of losing a mother to suicide, yet filmmaker Min Sook Lee is able to get the final word in understanding how to process her grief, family trauma, and so much more. It’s a heartfelt documentary that’s hard to watch, but one that deserves to be seen.
THERE ARE NO WORDS premieres at SBIFF on Thurs 2/12 – 8:40 PM